Thursday, November 30, 2006
been a while. so, i turned 21 last month. woopeedoo.. right.
i've been wandering off lately, mentally. its the time of the year again where i need to get away from this country. take a break, a kit kat.
played the guitar today, my fingers are bleeding as i type away.. been a while since i had time to waste the day away, just valentine and i, in this humid room, making music, and i can't wait to get a new guitar.. (valentine is the name of my guitar btw).
did i mention that i went back to brunei for about 2 weeks? same old place. enjoyed as much as i could with old friends, fana, her bf, yuda and hakim and all the other little cousins. they legalised fireworks this year for the raya celebrations. it was beautiful.
i have to fight this monster of despair. its sucking out the marrow of my life, slowly, but surely. i wake up with clenched fists, as i have to go on with this life, that doesnt seem to be getting any better. for the people i love, i jump out of bed and hope for better days. times like these, maybe i should start anew, some place else. i was thinking of travelling and finding a job in some other foreign place. save up enough to head somewhere else and start again. go on until i think its time for me to come home, and decide where home is exactly. maybe i should join the navy, the Decisive force.. ha ha. lame.
till i think of something else.